There Will Be Things In It: Blog Entry One

First article, what to write? I think I am going to tell everyone a cautionary tale, so I want you all to listen up.

First I would like to start by saying that if you ever get the idea to pull the fire alarm in a building.. Don’t!

It was probably 2:00AM and I was partying at a friend’s residence. All of a sudden the alarm starts blaring and shit gets chaotic. A hoard of drunks spew from the residence, resulting in one broken leg, and we all fill the parking lot. The bullshit part was in the commotion I forgot:

a) more drinks

b) contraband and

c) keys to the car I had in the parking lot

Anyways, after sitting on a curb in the parking lot, freezing, we moved into a different hall. Not much better because I was feeling shitty and there was nowhere to sit.

Suddenly some poor bastard barfs all over his legs and feet. In a flash there was probably a fifteen foot clearance around the guy. My friend, her room mates and I made our move for the empty benches near the outskirts of the circle.

Anyways, long story short, we sit there for hours, make one trip to Mac’s for chocolate milk that tasted like garbage. Suddenly everyone is allowed in, floor by floor. Awesome, except for the fact that they are checking student ID cards now! My friend and I decide it is probably fruitless for me to try to get in (side note: her room mates Italian friends all were able to bullshit there way in... I was going to pretend to be some Australian but he forgot to give us his room number). My friend ran to her room and grabbed my keys and we decided to drive around for a while. When we got back the security had gone away and we got back in around 5AM. Very strung out at that time, I had a beer and started to come around. The Italians were yelling “White Power” at me, I laughed and they thought I found them funny.

Eventually I got to sleep in a very warm room on a very tiny bed, but it beat sleeping in my car. I guess the guy who pulled the alarm got arrested, but that will never make up for all the time I lost due to his ugly crime.

So, in conclusion, if you DO pull the fire alarm you are a real douche-bag.

-Kyle